Hush now baby, baby, dont you cry.
Mother's gonna make all your nightmares come true.
Mother's gonna put all her fears into you.” – Pink Floyd
Dreams are funny things. They can put a smile on your face as you wake up from them or they can leave you in a panic as you fight to wake up. I usually don’t have dreams per say, not the nice ones at least. The best way I can describe it is as visions or a sense of future déjà vu.
I think I constantly find myself doing is looking at planes go over me and wonder will this be the day I see one go down. As terrible and horrific as it sounds, I have had that dream. Standing outside of my house and 1st hearing the plane then looking up to see smoke and fire and the plane getting lower and lower. I always think the same think: Don’t rush, try to gauge where the plane will go down, gather up my family head the opposite way, call 911, get my cell phone out and start recording….well I might as well get paid for the footage. Most people have hurricane preparedness plans and even zombie apocalypse plans (I have one of those), I have a “Oh shit, a plane is crashing plan”.
I do not know of the psychology of what you dream. If you dream that you see yourself die, will you die? Of course, we all do at sometime or another and yes I have seen myself die in my dreams and of course one of them was by a plane crashing on top of me. Is our subconscious trying to tell us something? The dreams I hate the most involve my kids, those are the ones that I struggle and fight to wake up from and those are truly nightmares.
On a couple of occasions I will see something happening and get a sense of déjà vu and I feel that I saw before in my sleep. Now I wouldn’t go as far as saying that I am the drugged out painter from the 1st season of Heroes, but I get that vibe sometimes. I have told myself many of times that I need to have a pen and paper by my bed to jot down what I saw in my dreams since I tend to remember them vividly when I 1st wake up. But as quick as I get up they start to fade, especially the good dreams, the nightmares tend to last a little longer.
I guess a bad back can be a blessing and a curse, since I can only sleep for a few hours at a time before the pain sets in and I have to start with the tossing and turning to get comfortable.
Hopefully tonight I dream of the lotto and I remember to jot down to 6 little numbers.
Sweet Dreams!
Thursday, May 20, 2010
Thursday, May 13, 2010
Life moves pretty fast.
Life moves pretty fast. If you don't stop and look around once in a while, you could miss it. – Ferris Bueller.
These past few weeks have been a total blur. Between work shit, moving shit, injury shit, ex-wife shit, kids shit....you can say it has been pretty shitty. Don’t get me wrong, it hasn’t been all shitty, nothing a bottle of rum can never fix.
1st I had moving drama, you always hate to move. The packing up of all your shit and wondering to yourself..(Damn I didn’t think I had this much crap) then dealing with the ghetto ass chick and her Ed Hardy wearing boyfriend who were trying to get the same apartment we were. So after some tense moments we got the apartment. Pro’s are that it has a great view, con’s you have to maneuver 3 flights of killer stairs. With the helps of friends we were able to get the place painted and moved in less than 3 days. In between we had a work function for Lydia and I was impressed that the free booze was top shelf. I made them pay for open bar after I killed a few screwdrivers in less than an hour. Then the after party was at our new across the hall neighbor’s place. More drinking and I was baptized the official DJ of the Arms. Saturday night after a full day of moving we hit Harvey’s on the day for a night of good friends and cheap beer. Note to self, do not go to Harvey’s when they have PPV fights or Ghetto proms. Sunday, I woke up hung over (go figure) and made the trek for a day of fun in the sun at the beach with good friends. To bad shortly into the party, Lydia took a tumble off of a wall and really messed up her ankle, she was a trooper and lasted at the BBQ until late in the afternoon, and then we were off to the hospital for X-Rays. So long story short, after a week on crutches with a possible fracture in her ankle, she is now in a boot with messed up tendons. Finally a week later we were able to go to the new apartment with all the boxes waiting for us to unpack them. Slowly but surely.
Work on the other hand is also stressful and tense with dealing with our crazy employee who was terminated. Now comes the appeal that I am sure she is going to do, and then the hearing. Thank the baby Jesus that I like to write supervisor notes, so I should be good to go. We also had Law Day at my job this week, in which I had to prepare my office for. It wasn’t a big deal but when you have a boss that worries about everything it can be stressful. Really how many times do you need to ask me about a banner in the course of 45 minutes?
That leads me to baby-momma drama. Where do I start on this one? Funny I always cringe when I answer my phone and I hear “Sorry to bother you, but”. I have been getting a lot of those calls lately regarding my son. She complains and complains and I feel like telling her “What the fuck do you want me to do from 1,000 miles away?” So I try to talk to him and tell him to do good in school, if not then he will have to go to summer school and not be able to visit me, I tell him to respect his mother and protect his sister. I get the impression that he is on the other line picturing the teacher’s voice from the peanut cartoons “whaa, whaa, blah, blah”. So on top of having to worry about him and the prospect of them not coming to visit in June, now I have to deal with my momma issue of what I need to do, and what his mother isn’t doing regarding him and how I should contact my attorney. WHAT THE FUCK IS MY ATTORNEY GOING TO DO IF THE KID DOESN’T DO HIS HOMEWORK?????
I seriously need a mental health day. So I see water, beer, bait and fishing poles in my near future.
These past few weeks have been a total blur. Between work shit, moving shit, injury shit, ex-wife shit, kids shit....you can say it has been pretty shitty. Don’t get me wrong, it hasn’t been all shitty, nothing a bottle of rum can never fix.
1st I had moving drama, you always hate to move. The packing up of all your shit and wondering to yourself..(Damn I didn’t think I had this much crap) then dealing with the ghetto ass chick and her Ed Hardy wearing boyfriend who were trying to get the same apartment we were. So after some tense moments we got the apartment. Pro’s are that it has a great view, con’s you have to maneuver 3 flights of killer stairs. With the helps of friends we were able to get the place painted and moved in less than 3 days. In between we had a work function for Lydia and I was impressed that the free booze was top shelf. I made them pay for open bar after I killed a few screwdrivers in less than an hour. Then the after party was at our new across the hall neighbor’s place. More drinking and I was baptized the official DJ of the Arms. Saturday night after a full day of moving we hit Harvey’s on the day for a night of good friends and cheap beer. Note to self, do not go to Harvey’s when they have PPV fights or Ghetto proms. Sunday, I woke up hung over (go figure) and made the trek for a day of fun in the sun at the beach with good friends. To bad shortly into the party, Lydia took a tumble off of a wall and really messed up her ankle, she was a trooper and lasted at the BBQ until late in the afternoon, and then we were off to the hospital for X-Rays. So long story short, after a week on crutches with a possible fracture in her ankle, she is now in a boot with messed up tendons. Finally a week later we were able to go to the new apartment with all the boxes waiting for us to unpack them. Slowly but surely.
Work on the other hand is also stressful and tense with dealing with our crazy employee who was terminated. Now comes the appeal that I am sure she is going to do, and then the hearing. Thank the baby Jesus that I like to write supervisor notes, so I should be good to go. We also had Law Day at my job this week, in which I had to prepare my office for. It wasn’t a big deal but when you have a boss that worries about everything it can be stressful. Really how many times do you need to ask me about a banner in the course of 45 minutes?
That leads me to baby-momma drama. Where do I start on this one? Funny I always cringe when I answer my phone and I hear “Sorry to bother you, but”. I have been getting a lot of those calls lately regarding my son. She complains and complains and I feel like telling her “What the fuck do you want me to do from 1,000 miles away?” So I try to talk to him and tell him to do good in school, if not then he will have to go to summer school and not be able to visit me, I tell him to respect his mother and protect his sister. I get the impression that he is on the other line picturing the teacher’s voice from the peanut cartoons “whaa, whaa, blah, blah”. So on top of having to worry about him and the prospect of them not coming to visit in June, now I have to deal with my momma issue of what I need to do, and what his mother isn’t doing regarding him and how I should contact my attorney. WHAT THE FUCK IS MY ATTORNEY GOING TO DO IF THE KID DOESN’T DO HIS HOMEWORK?????
I seriously need a mental health day. So I see water, beer, bait and fishing poles in my near future.
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